Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Ghost Writer

Well that's a bit surreal. First I get an email more or less saying " I bought a book I thought was by you but it wasn't; what's your's called?", so I say nope, not me. Then I get another email from someone else wondering if the rumour's true and where's this book I've written?


I related this to TPTB and the cutting remark was "you been writing it in your sleep then?". Well if I have I've also submitted it for publication in my sleep, got all the rejection slips in my sleep and, worst of all, spent all the royalties in my sleep too.

It's all a bit peculiar and I can only conclude it to be a side effect of leaving the UKWS forum to it's own devices - although I never thought it'd go to pieces and start getting delusional within a week

But should anyone be desperate enough to need a literary fix from Alf Towers, I can offer up the old man and my grandma as sacrifices on the altar of Amazon. Although editor? Editor my foot. They re-wrote the blooming thing. The publisher's, Brown, Son and Ferguson, are a curiosity indeed. They publish the Nautical Magazine, which seems to have remained unchanged and unaffected by the passage of the years. ("A year's subscription to the Nautical Magazine is a sound investment" for the love of Norm. How ancient a turn of phrase is that?!)
I'm convinced their offices in Glasgow probably have a "boy" who's sent up a grandiose winding staircase to annouce your arrival to the directors. The old man does book reviews for it; very short ones. So although reviewing may be hereditary, brevity apparently isn't... To top off B,S & F's original approach to publishing, they actually put up the price of books that haven't yet sold their whole run. 'Strordinary. Works though; Meterology for Seafarers is in its second edition now, which isn't bad.

So me, an author? Nope. But worryingly it is in the blood, so it might be
that, one day, just when you thought it was safe to return to the bookshelves...

Woodworking-wise, a longer set screw for the Veritas Bevel-Up Jointer fence arrived in the post this morning. Unasked. Heck, I didn't even properly buy the fence; this is way above and beyond the call of customer service. LV, you are the Best.

1 comment:

  1. " a side effect of leaving the UKWS forum to it's own devices"

    What happened Alf?, I blinked and you were gone!


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